What is a Wat?

So there I was, parked at little India aka Diamond Plaza in Parklands and about to order my food - love the fact that you get car service there (so when in pyjamas and no make up and hungry, this is THE place to go) - and boom it happened, a waiter came to the car and said 'Habari Mama..' (in my head and a very bad translation: hello you old woman)

I didn't know whether to oblige the guy with the same politeness that t he approached me with or to begin balling my eyes out that it had happened - I went from dame (young lass) to Mama (old mother Hubbard) over night. Well, the fact is, I am a Mama. In fact, on my BB profile I am known as Mama Ariyana - so may be I attracted this. But jeez, I have only known  like really old women to be called mama and for as long as I so, dare I ask (gulp), does that mean I am now in that (ahem) bracket? As in, do dames look at me and think mama?

I am not in denial. I am embracing my age with grace (all 16 years of me) and since I hit my 30's I value a lot more (and also realize that I love my family more - especially an aunty - am sure you have heard of her anti wrinkle). I am doing my best to keep age at bay, because I love my youth ("haha" I hear the waiter at Diamond Plaza say). So I am in my thirties, so I am a mum and a wife and I go grocery shopping and drive a mom type car. So I am a mama per se, I still feel like I am about to hit the prime of my life. My heart does not feel as old as I am living. Sure, gone are the days where I would party until the next day (we are keeping wrinkles at bay remember, 8 hours of sleep is essential!) and my energy levels seemed to have dropped a notch, but am I really a mama?

There has to be a kinder word that we can begin to use to describe women like me. I know mama is respectful and it is an honour to be addressed as mama but I can wait until I hit 50 to be called mama. For now a 30 something diva, hustling mother, fashionista needs more of a trendy name so that when someone greets her in public she doesn't dive under a garbage can because of the shame of going from cool lala chicklet to saggy and grey maaamaa! Btw, I know the definition of mama is NOT saggy, grey or wrinkley -  this is just my definition of it in my head (I need therapy, I know) and because this is my blog I am free to write what I want.
I think we need a transition name.. hmmm... let's think....
Aha! (My aha moment, Oprah would be so proud)
WATTIAHMSo the next time a waiter comes up to me I want him to say 'habari wattiahm..' or 'what's up wattiahm'
WATTIAHM DEFINED: Woman About To Turn Into A (Hot) Mama (the H is silent)
Shorter version (so we can tweet it and not use all the characters on twitter) a WAT (What's a wat? A wat is a woman about to turn into a mama, an older yet remaining hot mama..a like the ring to it.. )

Desi Girl

Desi - slang for Indian. As I type this am watching the video for a song titled 'Desi Girl' - at its time it was a huge track and the movie it was in was also a huge success. The song is about 4 years old now and I have my own lil desi girl - Ariyana.

I had stopped blogging for a while because I couldn't think of what to blog about and to be honest I had wanted to announce my second pregnancy, but instead am writing about my third miscarriage. I know sad, questionable even - I mean three is quite a big number. But I am ok, getting over it bit by bit. I don't know what I would have done if I didn't have my lil angel Ariyana in my life. I am focusing on counting my blessings. I have plenty!

So 2011 has been a year of contradictions. Things were meant to happen but didn't materialize and I fell in love with being a mama. My TV show landed on the shelf and I am wondering if I should ask for payment for the shows I did do. On the upside I got cast in Changes, the MNET TV show - its a bit part, I play Gina who has a good role, I feel. In this season I am in two episodes and I shot episode 7 and had such a ball doing it.

I have no idea what 2012 has in store for us. I know I need to shed light on EPW and how a woman can handle it, otherwise why would it keep happening to me - for a reason, to be a source of inspiration and comfort. I had a fantastic opportunity that opened up for me and should come through by Jan next year, fingers crossed. What are your plans for 2012?

Just thought I would update you so you don't stop reading my blog and when I am more inspired I will write more and be more interesting, promise..
Have a good one

I wore white..

I wore white for you my lil soul, to remember our few months together
I wore white for you and as I looked up in the sky, I saw a helium balloon - the essence of your soul, floating high into the sky
I wore white for you, not intentionally though, but I knew it was for you
I wore white for you because although you were, you were not meant to be
I wore white for you because you fought hard to make your lil heart beat, but somehow it just gave up
I wore white for you because I had already picked out a name and thought of what you would wear when I would bring you home
I wore white for you because my love, as much as I didn't hold you in my arms, I held you within me
I wore white for you because...well because I am a mother...and for two months I had the pleasure to be yours..
I wore white for you, I will try not to shed a tear, it is hard though..
I will now wear colour for all that I have and be grateful for the special things, the blessings and hope one day we may meet again

Mind the suit..

'Mama Ariyana, uja maliza chai?' asks my house help this morning looking at my unfinished cup of tea. I only had two sips because as is with my morning tradition which is- I wake up, meditate, do a bit of yoga, make Ariyana's breakfast and then have my tea and read the paper. The paper today put me off my food and made me think about how the media influences our lives.

As we know 100 lives were lost in a tragic fire and as usual the victims of any disaster are those who already have a very tough life. This time fuel leaked into a river that passes through a slum, nothing unusual because when this happens the slum residents try and scoop out the fuel as a means of survival. Unfortunately, a lit flame caused an explosion that traveled down into the slum as it followed the fuel. Our news teams rushed to cover the incident, our politicians rushed to the location (after speaking to their PAs who gave them an all clear, it is safe, am sure) and scores of people were rushed to the hospitals.
Someone on Facebook said that they knew the media would devour every inch of this unfortunate incident for ratings. Today's papers feature photographs of charred bodies, once particular photo described as too graphic is that of a skeleton with ash around it - burnt flesh of course.

My Twitter timeline went nuts about how inappropriate that photograph is and how low some media houses can go to get sales and blah blah. I agree. It is wrong for the media to stoop low - I mean, I would not want my daughter to be exposed to such an image. It disturbed me, albeit she is too young to understand but what about those children who are not too young? Surely they could have warned us somehow. But this is an image that will live with us for time to come. Unfortunately it is on the front page. The scandal that surrounds it will generate more awareness of it and the paper will definitely be talked about, have more sales and as one person on Twitter said - probably apologize for it tomorrow.

But a picture does speak more than a thousand words. I was reading The Nation and they have 8 pages on the story today. Some pictures stood out for me - one of our VP treading trough the slums - with his trousers rolled up, mind you - God forbid he get some Slum Mud on his Valentino suit! Another of our president visiting the victims in hospital. His face, according to me, says 'Thank goodness I am not that poor man and even if I do suffer burns thank goodness I can afford the care and the costly medical expenses.' My fellow facebookers also predicted that politicians would use this opportunity to be seen and heard.

Media knows very well - shock, scandal, sex and shit sells! It is a fact. No one wants to turn on the news and see happy people. No one wants to hear about who did good. And this same media is what shapes our society.
I do not watch the news and from today I refuse to read the paper. You may call me ignorant, lazy - whatever. But I choose what I allow to enter my space. What I allow to come into my thoughts becomes my reality. I do not live in denial, however. I am aware of what goes on, but what I concentrate on, what I focus on becomes my reality. If I allow all the negativity that is written or filmed to envelope my world then my reality becomes dim and dull and depressing.

The media has a powerful role and they can make a change. They can mold our people into positive thinkers and bigger thinkers, the achievers can be celebrated for doing good things and be the true role models. Because of their incessant messages, their power, their reach - they can create our reality.
My disclaimer right here is that these are just my thoughts put down on this page. I point no fingers and I blame no one, but I hope someone somewhere takes a moment to just think about how they shape their lives and therefore the lives of others..

My heart goes out to the victims of this tragedy and their families. May God rest their souls in eternal peace. May the ones in hospital receive healing and may the families who have suffered unjustly find strength to deal with the pain the reality of this event brings with it.

Just smile and suck it in darlin...

I remember my first photo shoot.. it was not fun, I had no confidence, I carried business suits to impress potential model agents and the shoot was done by none other than Peter Beard the man who discovered Iman (if memory does not fail me). I was way too over weight, too young, had very bushy eyebrows and even bushier hair (yep, I did the thing of having a perm when it was in fashion). I went for the shoot because Evelyn Mungai, my mothers very good friend, knew Peter and she made the shoot happened. I have to thank the likes of Evelyn because if it wasn't for her and people like her I would have gotten no where in the modeling field.

I was awkward, gawky and just not receptive to a camera lens in my face. You could clearly see this in the outcome. After that, things got better, not great, but yes, better. As with anything, practice makes perfect. At any given opportunity I would do a photo shoot just for the experience. I got more comfortable with the camera, the person behind the camera and I do know some secrets that make you look great once the shoot is done and dusted. I am lucky to have since shot in South Africa for the Cosmo cover, I have also been lucky enough to grace  numerous covers in Kenya and done shoots for fashion designers in Uganda, Tanzania and Kenya and have shot in the UK with top photographers as well as in India with, as they would say 'Bollywood' photographers.

Today I would drop everything for a photo shoot - they are fun and I like fun, they are super creative - I like creativity and the outcome is simply stunning. Today, technology is far better, lighting is spectacular, make up artistes are amazing. You can make a day out of a photo shoot. You get there and there is food waiting for you, hair and make up get to work and then the stylists pull out looks that one could only ever imagine looking good together.
Kenya today knows its business in the industry and can boast some serious ass photogs, make up stylists, stylists and hair peeps. I am impressed.

My tip for a fantastic photo shoot - sleep well the night before, hydrate (this always shows if you do or you don't), be comfortable with the looks they pick out for you, talk to your make up artist about what you know you will confident in then when the lights go on, smile baby and suck it in -that is no industry secret- and have fun as you are in for the ride of your life.

Check out some snaps from my day with Barbara Minishi about two weeks ago..it is magnificent what some great make up and fantastic lighting can do to one's ego!!
www.thebarbaraminishi.com is her site.

By the way for more insights into what a real glam photo shoot is ALL about, I highly recommend you read the book BossyPants, by Tina Fey.

PS these photos may be for commercial use so have just used some of the shots that I had permission to share.

My first Kiss...

'Habari yako, tume tumwa ku kuuwe, bona unaongeya juu yangu? Thafadali piga simu tu ongeye' or something like that was the gist of the text message that I suppose was meant to be a death threat. At least they were nic enough to say 'habari yako' - Kiswahili for 'how are you?' and 'thafadali' - Kiswahili for 'please'.
My thoughts are, if you are going to hurt me, you are not going to warn me - forewarned is forearmed, but then again, the person on the other end of the sms seemed polite enough to give me a heads up - his mother must have raised him well (aside from the fact that he may actually kill people).

I can joke and laugh about it, but it is unnerving and sends a chill down your spine to receive a message like that. So I started to think, who would want me dead? I smiled because I could not count the number! Perhaps it was the person I shared my first kiss with. He was this hot Egyptian dude who had broken up with his very hot Indonesian girlfriend and needed a rebound girl. Guess who he set his eyes on - yup, monobrow me, who would have never got  kissed in high school had it not been for him. I remember him taking my good friend for a walk around the field to ask her if she could ask me if at 'hometime' I would meet him at the corner of the field for a snog. I (shamefully) did not play hard to get and at 3.00pm was there all ready. It wasn't what I thought it would be, kind of too wet for my liking and then it was over in perhaps 5 seconds.
Dude and his hot gf were back together the next day and they went back to ignoring me. Oh, why would he want me dead? Well you see, at the time of the kiss, I wore braces - the plate type - not the railway tracks and when he jammed his tongue in my mouth my first instinct was to close my mouth - I am not sure, but I think I may have hurt him!

If it's not him then may be it was the waiter I got into a fist fight with once. You see, we had gone out for lunch - the lady askari had directed us to park here instead of parking there and when we ate lunch and were ready to leave, the car was blocked. So I picked up a fight with the lady and asked her why she didn't direct the blocker the way she directed us (blockees) and she gave me a bit of attitude. To cut a long story short, it ended up being a melee and a waiter gave me a serious upper cut. I remember it hurt - my eyes were open but I couldn't see anything - that kind of humbled me and removed a serious chip off my shoulder. Hmmm.. so ya, I can rule him out - am sure he and I finished our issues there and then.
 
Who else? Let's see - there are some people I don't really care for in my life. They are in my life by default and that does not mean that I need to like them or kiss their asses. They don't like me for this. I know they don't like me and to be honest, I don't care. My life has so much more going on in it and their pettiness does not even feature. May be its a way to get my attention - try again!

Being in the business I am, you make plenty of enemies & frenemies! You meet people from all walks of life - those who want to know you because of the position you hold and how you can help them - you know who you are and how you have lunched me when I was the editor of DRUM - they want to know you because they want to do what you do - someone once said to me when I was on radio; 'I am only your friend because I want to do what you do and I can do it better' You meet people who take advantage and then you meet those who hate you and don't even hide it. I have met them all!

To be honest I cannot make out who the sms could be from - all I can say is that I send that person love and light - plenty of love and light and thank him (or her) for giving me something to blog about.

Boo!

Would you like to hear a ghost story? I am not into the horror films, I do not like blood and guts and all things gory but I am interested in things that make you go hmmm.. Ever sat around at a friends house during a sleep over and after talking about boys and fashion the topic of the supernatural comes up? Ever rented a movie and watched it and felt really creepy after because the story line was so close to reality?

I hate horror movies. I have watched Nightmare on Elm Street and seen through all the rubbish, I watched the Scream series and thought ok, interesting but there are a few movies that have given me sleepless nights and freaky vibes.
Let me tell you about the house I used to live in.

When I was three months old my family moved into a beautiful house in Loresho. It was set on 5 acres and it was huge. My dad wanted to buy this house and he made an agreement with the owner and he said he would renovate where necessary. He built the gate, the swimming pool, made the extensions and basically poured his love into this house. We had wall to wall carpeting, heck in one room we had floor to ceiling carpeting! This house was grand, it was my home.

6 years later my papa passed away - some would say he was too young to die. For me, the void will never be filled. Life went on as normal but odd things would happen - and for me, I  put it down to my imagination or may be that I was seeking attention - after all, I was the last born, the only girl and I had gone through the trauma of losing my father.
I remember as I got older and I would be alone at home I would hear things downstairs, like the kitchen chairs moving or a door being opened and shut. I would constantly see an owl in my garden, even though this animal is nocturnal, it would be staring right at me in the middle of the day.

The family business started to fail, things were not working out as well as they were meant to and one by one, we lost almost everything. The biggest blow was of course the death of my brother. When he was alive though, his friends and I were sat in his room one day and just like that, a light switched on and off - from the switch and we all saw it. There was one night that my TV switched on by itself and the video (haha, remember the era of the video?) started rewinding the tape in it by it self. I couldn't do anything but stare in disbelief.
After Raju died my eldest brother fell really ill. No doctor could diagnose his illness. He even went blind - but of course later regained his sight.
I used to sleep in my mums room (wouldn't you??) and I would hear footsteps. I remember when I would tell my mum she would say just pray. And I did and it would go away. Again, wild imagination or evil spirit playing mind games??

When I was 17 I had an official boyfriend. I took him home one evening and no one was there. It was dusk, I was locked out of the house. We took a walk in the huge garden. Of course, as a teen does, we took advantage of being alone. So we decided to kiss and as we leaned in for one, we heard someone behind us made the sound of a kiss in a mocking manner. There was no one behind us and gosh, did we freak out. We pelted our asses out of there, into his car and out of that compound.

I never looked too much into it but then as I got older friends would tell me that they felt an odd vibe. People would visit the house and say that this house was scary - but for me this was home. One day thieves decided to raid our home. They got my brother at the front door and he did a very brave (or foolish) thing. They held garden shears to his neck and told him to open the door. They were three. My brother told them to calm down and then yanked the shears from them and punched one of them. He then says that they all looked behind him and almost went pale as though they saw something paranormal. They ran into the shamba, we called the cops and Raj who got home in all of 5 minutes, to say the least, armed; it took 4 hours but they eventually fished them out of the shamba and they were arrested. That was an interesting night.


We left that house 7 years ago and we haven't had any strange experiences since. I know that if you have faith in positive energies you can always overcome negative experiences. Light always removes darkness. What utter shit, you may think! Perhaps -may be this is just my creative writing getting the best of me..but as with any scary story I have to leave you with the thought of it being as close to reality as possible.
I can tell you this - a new family moved into the lush house in Loresho that sits on 5 acres last year. Within 4 months the daughter of the house passed away from a mysterious illness and just last week her father died of a heart attack. Coincidence? You make your own conclusion. (play scary music here...tananananananananananananana)

News n Nonsense

So, J.Lo announced her separation, a meteor fell from the sky in a rural part of Kenya, Norway was bombed, Amy Winehouse died and in Kisumu they turn thugs into grass eating animals- the things that make the news. I stopped watching the news and even stopped reading the paper (I only buy the nation for the crossword) because it is filled with all things negative and to be honest I do not want to be surrounded with depressing stories because I would rather live in a world filled with good, positive vibes.
My husband always screams at me about not being in the know. You see there was a time when I could summarize a Newsweek or a Time in 30 minutes to you I was very aware about who raped who, which killer said what about a Kenyan musician, and how a certain person killed his wife's lover and handed the genitals to the police. But I am past that. I know that what you surround yourself with you will attract. So I choose not to know about inflation and drug overdoses, or famine and train crashes.
It is my world so it is my choice. It may change after a while but for now - I am quite content.

So this is how the week has started off - nice and sunny this morning. Last weeks blog brought about me chatting about 'death' - so we will have none of that. Instead I will just fill you in on the nonsense that is my life. I call it nonsense because to me, it is my life, but to you - you may think - WTF! And I am reading this looney crap? Like sometimes I watch the Kardashians or Jerseylicious (yep, instead of the news) and I think to myself what nonsense! But it is 'reality' TV. It is about their lives; how Kim doesn't touch a drink and how Khloe ignored her at a party and how Kourtney and Scott did it in the bathroom. Or how Tracy yelled and spat at Olivia and how Alexa bitched about Gayle and then cried about it (may be I watch it a bit too much). We all know it is scripted because otherwise it wouldn't be as interesting. I mean, how much of reality is 'interesting'. Like right now, if a camera were following me, they would catch me in my PJS, sitting in an unmade bed, sipping my green tea, clicking away at a computer. Of course, if they wanted to make it interesting - they would script in a phone call and I would be bitching about someone who would eventually find out and we would have a big blow up later on..
I go off tangent...hmm..where were we? Hmmm, oh yah, my week..

So the TV show I am working on - sort of on hold at the moment. Do not know why. I will find out and keep you posted. I may be doing a photo shoot for a new line of sexy stuff - again have to be vague, cannot reveal all just yet. We are in negotiations. Also may get a gig in the USA for a something. Gosh, it is hard to keep you posted as I talk in parables.

Aah! There was a wedding this weekend - but I only made it to the actual wedding - you know Asian weddings, they go on for like 10 days - and here is me, only showing up for the one function. But that is pretty much all I have to say about that -ooh, to spice it up,  I can tell you that the family of the groom is an ex-boyfriends family and also relatives; my cousin married his cousin. But that is kind of where that story ends. Weddings - I like getting dressed up and going for these do's - it is just so nice to people watch. The dressing up takes a lot out of you. I cannot imagine being there for all the functions, my wardrobe is not big enough. Raj always rolls his eyes when I say I have nothing to wear and my wardrobes are full. The thing is I cannot do repeats. I have learned that from being in the media - people remember what you wore, when you wore and how you wore it and you know - people like to say 'doesn't she have anything else to wear?' when they see you do a repeat outfit. I try and make the most of my outfits, the good thing is there are many different circles I roam in, so chances of me being seen in an outfit twice is rare. But I am cautious. Let's be honest, a woman can never have enough clothes or shoes..
Moving on, I tell you what I did do too much of this weekend- Artcafe. Artcafe is a restaurant in a popular mall and I was there for a meeting on Friday and then a girlie lunch on Saturday and then a family lunch on Sunday. I like their Rose and their food - but there is overkill and I think I may avoid the place for a while to come.

There was so much I wanted to share but now that I am sat here I cannot really think of much - must be the Monday blues or the fact that the brain is slowing down (too much frickin reality TV). Let's see this week may be more interesting in the world of Pink - if it is - I will share all in next weeks blog. Until then, you have a wonderful week, stay amazing and love yourself.

Me and Robin Sharma..or is it Robin Sharma and I?

So here is the deal; I got asked for an interview by the only Asian newspaper in town. At first I was slightly hesitant, long story, but because of the writer I agreed to go for it. I acted (key word) like a bit of a drama queen, I mean I know a lot of people call me a bitch, and well, I may as well live up to the reputation. But honest, the writer is a good person and has worked hard to be where she is, am glad that it was her who did my story and she did a good job. Plus I got to share the cover with one Robin Sharma. I saw something coming, I mean, I cannot hog the limelight.. You had be there for a certain part of my life to get it.
Anyway, long story short, thanks to Rav, you did a fantastic job!

Ah yes, if you read all my blogs, you will see that every now and then someone in my life passes away. Don't get me wrong, I am not trying to trivialize death. Quite the contrary. My mums brother passed away last week. I am sad because in a way it is an end of an era. On the other hand, with all my soul searching and my faith in the way things work, I know that this is the journey we will all travel and all we can do is hope that ours is peaceful and easy when the time comes. Uncle Dini was a part of my life; birthday parties, events, dinners, weddings, etc - he was always there. He was a dog lover, in fact he got me my first dog who was my best friend (as they are). I say, may your soul RIP, I know you are happy as you have met those who departed before you and I know you will always be with your family in spirit.
At the funeral, as much as they remind me of loved ones I have lost, I could not cry - not to say that I was forcing it - but all I found myself doing is praying and at one point planning my funeral - I made a mental note to write it down, how I would want things to go.
The reality is, we all must go, the not knowing when is scary but just means that we must all live well, tell people that matter to us that we love them and make a difference in a strangers life, even if it is with just a simple smile.

Wouldn't it totally freak your freak if I pass away like a week from today and then people will say -' its like she saw it coming, did you read her blog?' - that would be a great way to generate some traffic for the blog. Agreed, death is no laughing matter - but we still should be ready to laugh, its healthy!
(and she said we should laugh....sniff...)

So, I am in the middle of planning some photoshoots, chasing monies owed to me (I hate that), ignoring random texts from losers of the past and enjoying the company of my two doggies and my baby girl. She is so the best thing in the world (yes, they should make a t-shirt with that slogan for all mothers).  I love her company and watching what sort of a human being she is turning out to be. I tell you, she is exhausting though - her energy levels are super high and she is  very determined.
Ooh it is Raj's birthday today. I baked him a cake (not the boxed ones you get at the supermarket - a proper, butter and sugar, cake). I also made him breakfast and a steak dinner and have been pampering him and spoiling him. Raj is a simple dude and he is a blessing. I love having him in my life- I am one lucky lady! Yep, and before you ask - I am so not a domestic Godess - I can cook, I don't love it, so me being in the kitchen is a BIG deal.

How is going with the airplanking you ask? Well, we are trying to master the art. I have not photographed mine yet.. I know Gupz did, will have to send you the link and I know Suede is the guru, so follow him @iamsuede on twitter to learn. Btw, planking is a yoga position - it gives you amazing abs - it is to be done on a yoga mat on the floor - not somewhere where you can fall asleep or plummet to your death! Just an FYI.

Random - I got a strange what's app message from someone (famous) who tried to tell me about someone else (has been) which was so eh to me. Thought I would share, think they need attention. RANDOM!

Thanks for reading the nonsense..btw, the blog got a mention in the interview I did, way to go blog!
Until the next one - comment, skype, bbm, text, what's app, fb or tweet but be in touch (coz you know, this could be my last week alive...)

in the pink: Bumped off Al Jaz for the PM

in the pink: Bumped off Al Jaz for the PM: "Hello there! It has been a minute since I last posted a blog - and so much has been going on.. Let's see where do I start? Hmmmm...Ok let..."

Bumped off Al Jaz for the PM

Hello there!
It has been a minute since I last posted a blog - and so much has been going on..

Let's see where do I start? Hmmmm...Ok let's see, so a friend of mine approached me to film a TV show, she explained the whole idea of it, and I thought yaiy, sounds fun and agreed to jump on board. Call time was 6am, which for me means 6am and for everyone else meant 8.30am. Of course, I showed up at 6 and did nothing for a while accept eat breakfast and chat to the crew who must have thought "oh goodness she is eager..."
Anyway, we filmed 3 shows at a go, and it was super fun. I cannot say much about it, yes I was given a 10 page contract, but I don't think it said that there was a confidentiality agreement, but still, I have been in the biz a long while to know that there are some things you can say and some things you wait to be said.

What else? Oh yah, I organised the 2nd annual Fashion And Beauty expo at Westgate Shopping Mall. Wow! The turn out this year was super and the exhibitors were fantastic. Again, I have been in the event planning business long enough to know that you cannot please everybody! But I am open to listen to constructive critics, not haters! Reason the event is put together is because I am a shop-a-holic and I was pleasantly surprised to find out that I need not travel EVERYTIME I need to be trendy! It helps when you want the genuine designer stuff, but when you want to just go for a fad - here is a tip, buy it cheap because it ain't going to last! So here I am surfing the net and I see all sorts of Divas (a female version of a hustler as Beyonce put it) with these online stores and the trendiest bits in town. I would have loved to have hogged them but it makes sense to expose them to my fellow fashionistas. Then there is, of course, the local designers, who produce some stunning stuff.
Anyway, to cut a long story short, FAB is supposed to be a platform for everything available in Fashion And Beauty in Kenya.
Nana Gacega wrote a wonderful piece in The Star on Saturday - she, like me, loves to shop and she totally embraced the idea.
Anyway, while chatting FAB here are some sites to check out if you want to get your online shopping on;
www.2nu.co.ke
www.avid-style.com
www.fabguru.co.ke
www.silkdreams.co.ke
And if you are crazy about all things FAB, look out for www.fab.co.ke that will be launched real soon.

I got a call from a strange number and answered it and it  was Al Jazeera. They had heard of the charity work I do and wanted to interview me on a show called 'the Cafe'. Of course I said yes. They then sent me a series of emails about who what and when and asked me to answer all sorts of questions. I was pretty impressed with myself that my work would get acknowledgement and my opinion mattered. Last night I got another call from the same number telling me I had been bumped off the show as they would rather interview the PM, Mr. Odinga himself. Of course they would! Blah! But they have kept me on file for the next one.

So while all this is going on in my world, Ariyana is busy growing, and my oh my she has. I never knew 9 months would pass this quick and they have. The girl already has a mind of her own and is making me use all my energy on chasing her all over the house has she crawls. The other day she took two steps on her own without the help of anyone and I cried. Hey! Am a mama, and I had full right to cry. That is a day I will always remember. I keep wondering what sort of a person she will become. Honestly, this is the time I really value my mother, what an amazing job she did - as in, educated us, holiday-ed us, fed us, clothed us, etc and made it look pretty effortless.
I also look at Rajs parents and value them too. There was a time there when I thought I knew everything, but being a parent opens your eyes to a different world and humbles you in a way.

Speaking of Rajs parents, they are in India as we speak and I ask you to send Rajs dad a bit of healing energy (if you believe in that, otherwise just say a quick prayer for him) as he has been unwell and is under going medical treatment. Thank you for that.

The African Winter is in full swing, it is freaking freezing here in Nairobi and I have my heater on - thank goodness KPLC have not cut the power, as they do in our pretty city, whimsically I am sure! My tooth is sore so I have to get my ass to the dentists office, it is something I have been putting off for the longest and it's Monday (is that a good or a bad thing? For me makes no difference)

Oh by the way, I have become a bit addicted to Twitter and my friend DJ Gupz and I are learning how to Airplank courtesty of the guru himself, Suede. Follow us on twitter to find out more..
@pinkyghelani
@iamsuede
@Gupzsaund

Have a wonderful week and thanks for reading (and commenting) on the blog
ps..next one I am going to tell you about a Jewellery collection that I designed... FUN

Kenya's most notorious Killer...

Last week I heard of two deaths of people that I knew that were killed in road accidents.

It is sad that in Kenya if it is not the gun that gets you, it is our roads that kill you.
My brother died in a car accident and I remember at that time I wanted to create some sort of campaign to get the governments attention to help that it wouldn't happen anymore. No family should loose a member through a road disaster. But I didn't do anything and since then there have been plenty more deaths - most too young to die.

What is it about our Kenyan roads that allow for these tragedies to occur? Do we not have speeding rules? Can we blame it on corruption that the wrong cars are allowed on the roads - too much smoke from the exhaust, huge ass trailers, over speeding matatus?
Do you remember that song by Eric Wainaina - he was pleading with the matatu driver to slow down? I mean, we all want to earn the extra buck, but at what expense? That was a good initiative but it lost momentum.

Is it the roads that kill? Or could it be human error? I am not talking about the drivers that are at fault but the good Samaritans that rush to help. Do we lack expertise when an accident does occur? Everyone rushes to 'help' the injured and then moves them and perhaps creates further injury? (Note:I say help in quotes because all (some) people really do is first rob you of your belongings and then look for a car to take you to hospital.)
Perhaps the government need to launch a TV/radio campaign on how to treat the injured. A step by step guide on what to do so that when you do move the body you can further rapture/puncture or break what is misplaced and thus causing more damage.
Perhaps the government need to pay our traffic police force more so that they don't take bribes. Perhaps the government need to invest in our infrastructure, road wise, instead of taking shortcuts so that when you are doing a long haul safari it is safe to overtake without running the risk of going head on into an oncoming vehicle that is probably going faster than you are.

I am so stuck about what to do to help, but I really wish I could. I wish there was something we could do as families who have lost their loved ones to road accidents - if we could come together, we would be a loud voice to be listened to and perhaps we could change things.

It would take a lot of work, but I am ready to do it - may be the reason there are so many deaths on our roads is because we are all sitting back waiting for someone else to take action. May be it is up to us.
I lost a brother in a car accident - it could have been avoided. Frankly, I am kind of pissed off at how many more souls leave us because of the roads in Kenya - by roads I mean drivers, cars, traffic laws, etc.

My brother was a victim of a Kenyan Road Accident, let no more families suffer. What, pray tell, is the solution????

A love story...

I have to tell you a sad love story, I have no idea how it ends, I just hope unlike the other love stories, this one does not end in tragedy.....

I fell in love, deeply. But my relationship, over time, has changed. When I fell in love I was young, I was made to feel alive, beautiful and I thought this was it. I fell in love and it was a passionate relationship but today I look back at our relationship and I see things have changed.

What happened to that Kenya I fell in love with? Kenya used to love me, I would be a tourist in my own country and be able to afford it- now a night in Mombasa, in the hotels I like, cost about how much I would not like to spend on a room that I will hardly be in - after all, I go to the coast for the beach, not for the room. Kenya used to have time for me - there was no traffic, I could get from Loresho to town in all of 15 minutes at 11am or about 25 minutes maximum during rush hour. Today am in traffic for four hours at a stretch and people shrug their shoulders and say its the norm.
Kenya used to wine and dine me - I used to love the restaurants - I still do, they are exotic and offer all sorts of cuisines but it is too darn expensive to be able to afford a good meal. I used to be able to buy lunch for myself and a friend for about Kshs.600 today it costs an arm and a leg!
Kenya used to have self-esteem and pride. Now I look around and I feel that the place is prostituting itself. Every corner in Nairobi has been sold and is now being developed leading me to feel that I am in a concrete jungle. What happen to the Green of our capital city? When the film Out of Africa was released everyone in the world wanted to visit our great country - it was such a great way to market Kenya - but now the Far East is a better place to visit, say the tourists - it is still cheap and cheerful and not so corrupt as East Africa.
Kenya was polished and refined. Today it is crass and somewhat cheap!
Kenya was my security - today I am not so sure about relying on this country. It is not as strong as it used to be and as for the security, well, let's just put it this way - getting woken up at 5am because of gunfire on the road parallel to mine is a tad unnerving.
I see that Kenya has become a little heartless. I hear stories about how it is progressing, yet I am never made to feel that I have shared in the success. When a countrys economy grows - the people who live in the country should benefit, right? I see that Kenya favors the rich, they keep getting richer, and feels nothing for the poor - they keep get poorer.
The only thing I see rise is inflation in our relationship - sad huh? A woman has needs!
Ah my relationship with the Kenya I fell in love with has changed. Kenya has, I am ashamed to say, become violent. At one time we could boast peace! We were the most peaceful country in Africa. No civil unrest, no huge atrocities until I saw my country bleed during post-election violence in 2008. I lost faith, I lost trust.


I don't want to give up on this relationship, I made a promise to this country. I can walk away, but that is the easy way out, we have history my country and I. My love for this country has grown and we have had some magnificent times. I look at our relationship though and I feel that it is mostly one-sided. I keep giving (taxes, fees, blah blah blah) but I get nothing back.
My heart aches and breaks for the direction we are headed, I want to do something to bring us close together again. I want to believe in my first love again, but I am scared. I am not sure if I am able to trust.

I fell in love with my country, Kenya. I need a reason to keep loving it. Kenya, fight for us - our love. With me on your side we can conquer the world - but give me reason to believe in you again, give me a reason to love you the way I used to.

Hot or Cold?

So we are heading into our winter and I am kind of enjoying wearing the boots and the sweaters (all until 2pm when it suddenly becomes all blue sky-ish and summery..). But I trust that this July will be a cold one and am out and about searching for warm wear for my little bubba and (perfect excuse) me!

But my title has nothing to do with the weather, the blog is not going to discuss something you discuss when you have nothing to say. What I want to know is what makes people cold one minute and hot the next. Example, when you know someone, are sort of friends, but not really and you meet them a few times and they are very warm, sociable and interact with you. Then after a couple of months they completely snub you. They even make fun of you on facebook (friends of friends tell you this, not that you are their friend on FB, after all you are NOT thaaat close). They act bitchy when they see you, even turn away when you come face to face with them.

Then after a year they see you again and are super duper slurpy and chirpy. These are not the things that make you go hmmm.. These are the things that make you go EH! Like what is wrong with people? I always say though, that it cannot be everyone who has a problem, it must be me - as they say in math, common denominator. I don't even know if that's the right way to describe it.

Here are some examples of hot and cold. A deejay chick-e-dee is someone who wanted a break and would call me when I was at Capital FM. She would ask me to manage her, etc. So I tried, it didn't work out. All the same, I wanted her to succeed so when I was asked to write for Cosmo SA I featured her. The chick stopped talking to me because (she went around saying) I did not want her to be successful. Eh? Then there was a huge celeb wedding and I did not attend and she asked my then brother-in-law where I was and had a giggle about how I was banned from the wedding and my picture was with the bouncers at the door. Eh? First of all, no one needs my pic, I am that famous! Next, I see her at a gig that I was presenting for TV and she was playing at and she came up to me almost in tears and said 'if they didn't want me to play why did they ask me to'. Eh?????

I seem to attract some strange experiences. The point is when I meet someone they have to come out with a sentence to the effect 'Pinky, I had always heard such bad things about you, I always thought you are such a bitch, but you are actually such a nice person.'
Dude, first off, why are you talking about me (scratch that, I know EXACTLY why am being talked about), secondly, you know you don't believe anything and everything you hear and if you do then poor you! Unless you experience something first hand I say always be a non-believer!

But I feel it is always easier to believe that someone is 'bad' or 'cruel' or 'a bitch' before you get to know (which takes time) for yourself. I feel if you hear that someone is a nasty piece of work it makes you feel better about yourself and your life.
Gossip, if anything, actually negates the persons bad karma - this is my strong belief. So if you sit there and talk about me or anyone else, you take away any bad karma we are meant to face AND you add to that persons success!
Why is it so hard to be happy when someone else is happy? Or be thrilled when someone has achieved what you feel you can. Celebrate because it shows that dreams turn into reality - yours or mine! Send happiness and goodwill out and it comes back tenfold!

I remember when I was ripped apart by a friend of mine in the press. It was horrible that someone would want to do that to another person, but it made me a strong individual. I saw her last year and man was she nice to me! Bygones? Water under the bridge?

I wonder though what happens to me when people have been super nasty to me and they turn around and say 'hi' and I smile right back and say 'hi'. Sometimes I kick myself for being so 'nice'. I should have done this or ignored them or showed her the finger - I think to myself. But I thing if I carry anger within me it only burdens me. To be honest, I cannot be asked to carry their load on my shoulders.

Hot or cold, whatever your attitude, I will always send out warmth - for a selfish reason - what you send out, you get back and to be honest, from this point on, I only want GOOD experiences in my life.

I get that a lot...

I know, it has been two weeks since my last blog, but give me a break- am a full time momma and that is totally time consuming. Plus am organizing FAB, having meetings here and there, trying to sort stuff out, doing the skype meetings, I know I promised a weekly blog – am trying.

So let’s see, whats been happening. Of course, since my last blog, there was the infamous ‘fuel shortage’ in this great nation of ours. As I type this the power keeps going off and coming back on again and I read something in the paper about an impending maize shortage. Aaaaah TIA (this is Africa..). Something I have written more about in my other blog for Mi Fone. It’s a must read!

What I would love to talk about is shopping! So, here’s me, out with my baby and I notice that the Junctions new wing has opened. Of course in my teens I was a total Mall Rat – but we only had Sarit Center and Yaya center. Today we have plenty of malls to walk around in, but it still is not like the States, South Africa or Dubai where a whole day can go by and all you have done is spent it in one wing of the mall.

My favorite mall experience was in San Francisco. I think I had so little time to shop and I went running through the mall like a mad woman. Of course, I got hit on by plenty good looking younger guys..aaaah..so good for the ego. I love the outlets too. But I digress.

Back to my experience at the Junction; I walked into the Mr. Price home shop. I love shopping for my home. I never thought I was creative interior wise, but I love experimenting and playing with colors. The staff is super friendly and it is just a great way to while away sometime. I remember walking into the Westgate shop and they were having a staff meeting and they had to stop the meeting to allow me to come in. I felt soooo super celebrity-ish! It was a nice way to start the day and hey, it did not hurt their sales.

So, it just made me laugh out loud a little when one eager  beaver staff member came up to me and said “Hi IFF”… eh? OOOOhhhh he meant EVE. Right. I have to say, that’s not the first time its happened. I have been mistaken for Eve in the past when people think they know me and have seen me in the papers, etc, they just assume because we are both Indian that may be we are both the same people.

I used to get that a lot with Zain. In fact, that is how Zain Verjee and I got close; we were always mistaken for each other. When Raj sees her on TV he doesn’t see any resemblance but yeah, we were often mistaken for each other.

If you think that’s odd; listen to this - Rajs good friend thinks I look like Michael Jackson. Hmmm…I wonder if that is a complement. I don’t mind it so much because at one point in my teen years I so wanted to be (or thought I was) Janet Jackson!

You know they say that in the entire world there are at least 3 people who look like you? I wonder if that means they look EXACTLY like you, or there are just features or certain resemblances that just kinda look like you.

I don’t know what point I am trying to make. Ah yes, I don’t mind being confused for someone else. I don’t mind even being told I look like someone else (ahem, someone once told me I look like a Kardashian…yah, with my FLAT ass, I doubt it). I remember when the pussycat dolls released their first single and people said I looked like Nicole Sherzniger (is that how you spell it?) – yeah, her washboard tummy and my wobbly tummy have SOOOO much in common! Someone said it was the hair…aaah, my hair looks like her?

Whatever you look like, nothing can stop you from looking happy when you get yourself a good buy. I love shopping. I am so excited about the new malls and the new wings and the new shops that are opening up in Kenya. And no matter how busy I am, I will always find the time for retail therapy because even if I don’t buy anything I know I am guaranteed an enlivening experience. (Maybe next time I will purposely dress like someone and see if I get mistaken for that person..any suggestions?)

Ding Dong..wedding bells

I do enjoy my life, there is always something interesting going on. I am trying to juggle it, now with bubba getting older, I am able to do a lot more things work wise, but its funny how much I miss her when I am away from her.
Having said that, a girl needs to hustle and get business back to what it was, so I am back to the grind, doing the meetings, the fashion shows, the deals and it feels good.

Of course, it was all about weddings last week. Like most of the world, I was glued to the TV catching re-runs of the royal wedding that seemed to have all my friends floored. It really was a beautiful ceremony and was so nice to watch this couple get wed. Can you believe that this couple had to get married in front of 2 billion people! It is bad enough when a bride has to have things go her way just for 150 people. In no way did our 'commoner' Kate look like she had a moment of being a bridezilla at all. She seemed so regal, calm and serene. Like the fashion critics, I agree, she got the dress right and she just looked stunning. I loved, loved, loved her Cartier tiara and even though I do not know her personally, I found myself crying at how wonderful the ceremony was and how beautiful it all turned out. I was just..sniff...sooo...sniff...happy!!

I wonder how her mother felt, when she was born and she cradled her in her arms, did she ever think that this little girl would be the next queen of England? I made sure I watched the pomp and glamor with my lil munchkin, because, as I explained to her, this could her future family too. (A mother can dream)

Aside from that there was a wedding in the family that I had to be a part of. You could call it a shotgun wedding, which is fine by me. Each to their own. Of course, when the event came around there was so much excitement and fun about it that during the evening party a woman fainted and my gut instinct was to run to her and try and help. I opened a bottle of water and put a little in her mouth and was yelled at by someone who was standing by her legs. 'NEVER EVER DO THAT TO SOMEONE WHO HAS FAINTED' he boomed. Err, all I was doing was trying to help. I wanted to ask him who on earth he thought he was and wanted to add 'are you a doctor?'. Turned out he was a doctor and in retrospect I should not have assumed that the lady was thirsty. I guess his yelling at me made him feel he was helping her more. Whatever floats your boat dude! I would hate for him to give me bad news in a hospital - can you imagine? Anyways, that did not stop me from dancing the night away.

I started to think about my wedding and how I got married and what I would do differently. I think all wives wish they had done something different on their day. I mean as times change so do themes and decor ideas and cakes and wedding dresses (case in point compare Dianas dress to Kates dress..world's apart). There are so many things available now that I would need thousands nah...millions of dollars to redo my wedding. I think it was the way it was meant to be though. But I would have loved to have done it in Vegas or just taken 70 people to the beach and worn a white bikini a la Pamela Anderson.

I have already started planning Ariyanas wedding, if you are a mom you get it! I know exactly how I want it to be. But I have to remember one thing, it is not my wedding - I will have  to respect her wishes and allow her to plan it the way she would want it - what would make her happy. Someone told me something that still rings true - weddings are mostly for the parents of the bride and the groom, if the couple are OK with that then they can let their parents take over. Otherwise the best thing is to just do it your way because 5 years later, unless you are Kate and Will, no one will really remember what YOUR day was like.
Also you will be stuck with your wedding album for life and you have to be able to look at the photos and feel really, really happy because that was exactly the way you wanted it to be.

I was given some fantastic advice when I got hitched; be in the moment, and that is advice I can only pass on to future brides. Sometimes we get so caught up in the silly stuff that weddings are made of that we forget who was there and when you think about it the memories are like a blur and super vague. Be in the moment, soak it up and enjoy - the moment will never come back so treasure it and enjoy!

in the pink: Positive Vibrations

in the pink: Positive Vibrations: "I know that I had something to share; it wasn't profound, it wasn't new, but I know it was something that I would write in my blog. Yet, whe..."

Positive Vibrations

I know that I had something to share; it wasn't profound, it wasn't new, but I know it was something that I would write in my blog. Yet, when I sat in front of the laptop today I went totally blank. I forgot all about what I was going to share.
The memory fades when you are a new mum, you are so busy running around that sometimes you become a bit absent minded. (Or may be its just age and I am in denial). As I type this, Invictus is playing on TV, husband has gone out for a stag night and baby is tucked away in bed. My company are my two lovable dogs who are also sound asleep. I am not writing with purpose or direction, I am just click clacking away on the keyboard and seeing where this is going to lead.

You know, I have stopped watching the news or even reading the headlines in the papers. I skip through to the crossword and sudoku page because I think the world has gone nuts! I met a psychic a few weeks ago and I asked her about the world coming to an end in 2012 and she smiled. She knows something, I just asked her because we met, and I came to know that she is a psychic as a new mum and a person planning more kids, I gotta know if the world is ending - so I asked.

I never got a response. Anyway, I have stopped watching the news because it is just too dull and too depressing. I don't live in that much denial, but I choose not to surround myself with negative stories, energies and just that yukie vybe. It is sad to see what is happening to mankind, to countries, to animals and to our planet. I am pretty sure that we are well on our way to imploding or exploding.

How come when we see so much pain in the world we are praying less? We have less faith? We are more greedy, commit more sin and lie and hurt others so easily? What is going on? (I actually wanted to say what the f is going on, but that is not very positive..right?)

I don't want the world to end in 2012 - but, that is not for me to decide. There are many theories out there about the Mayan calendar or the planets all being in a line that it will change what is happening on earth or that we are about to enter a new age and therefore the earth needs healing, etc. What if the world ended next year in December? Are you doing what makes you happy? Are you focusing on the big things or wasting energy on petty politics? Are you bettering somebody's life, even if it is your own without any selfish motives?

Hey, I am not here to judge. I am just tired of being surrounded by the negative energy. If anything I urge you to be grateful and thankful and a little bit more positive every day. Reason: positive energy vibrates quicker and you feel it quicker. You are positive, then the energy spreads - your neighbor feels it, your pastor feels it, your wife and they take it to work or play and boom, the good vibe silently seeps into your pores and your children's, and your bosses - the ripple effect has no end!
Pray more, laugh more, let your ego be and enjoy because lets face it; if the world does end in 2012, we all die happy! And to be honest, when we are walking to the light, together, I want to go laughing and joking with all of you - I don't want to be surrounded by a bunch of mopey, complaining souls!

Be the change you want to see in the world - Mahatma Gandhi.

Armpit what???

My computer had been down for all of last week. So annoying!! But for the moment it is working OK, not as good as it was before, seems some programmes have gone missing including Skype but it just means extra work for me this week ahead.

Last week I managed to catch one of my favorite shows on TV - Fashion Police with Joan Rivers. Joan is old, she is so old it hurts, but her wit and humor get me every time. I think she has one foot in the grave (understatement) that she doesn't really care if she makes any enemies. Or may be she is so past that age and stage of trying to people please that she just tells it like it is and shrugs her shoulders and what the reaction of others may be.

Anywho, on the show, the four fashion experts were talking about something that intrigued me- I could so relate because a couple of weeks ago when I wore my corset I noticed it for the very first time. If you are in your teens or twenties stop reading now because you will just not get it. If you are over and above and have ever looked at yourself in the mirror and wondered what the hell that extra meat is hanging out of your armpit then read on.

You know when you hold your arm close to your body and there is a big fold of skin where your armpit meets your chest? That is called Armpit FAT. Armpit fat!!! EEEWWWW! I was disgusted with myself for even noticing it on my body. You see, I do the yoga, I run, I lost the baby weight within three weeks, so I felt totally let down (by myself) when I saw that I owned ARMPIT FAT. Gross.

If you know what I am talking about then you too must have had a horror moment in front of your mirror. You may also have gone into the gym and did some extra arm and chest work to be rid of it. You can help get rid of it with jumping jacks but, and this is a BIG BUT,  I did some research and found out that it is not all gloom and doom, ladies. All it is is breast tissue that has sort of traveled (without a visa, how dare it!). All you have to do is wear the right bra and when you put the bra on, bend over and pull in all the extra tissue and then tighten your bra straps. Do this for three or four days and viola, no more armpit fat!!!!! I did it and I am super happy that my jet setting breast tissue is back home safe and sound.

The point is, we all get older, things tend to shift and sag but it really is up to us to maintain the good looks and shapely figure - its a simple rule of thumb! Have a beautiful week.

Bangles and beads and bobbles..

Before I begin - I found the shoes, phew! Hubby was playing an early April Fools joke on me!

So, how has the week been for you? Confusing in terms of weather? I know! I don't know how to dress at this time of the year - but I feel if you layer it, you can always peel off what feels uncomfy. But nope, my blog is not going to be fashion tips and what have you, this week I have decided to name drop in my blog.

So last week started off in a super exciting manner. I forgot to mention that I met up with THE Randolph Gray at Brew Bistro last Sat night. Randolph is hair stylist to the stars and has been doing my hair for over 10 years. I love him, his humour, his attitude - everything. We are supposed to be doing a fashion shoot sometime this week - I cannot wait! That night I also met long time pal Paul Kukubo at the same place. Paul is in the IT industry and works for the government - he deserves every piece of success he gets because he has worked real hard for it and well, is an overall nice guy.

That was Saturday night, Tuesday came around and I found myself sipping an ice cold coke with none other than Deejay Adrian. Ady and I go way back - almost 10 years or more. We were chatting about so much and catching up on the days when we had mad fun together - that included a trip to LA together. I have decided that I am going to be his sidekick. The guy travels like mad and he has the equation sorted - less work, more money and TRAVEL. Don't we love to travel. Plus, I gave him a few hints and ideas - am sure he is going to implement them, so from this point on if he does ANYTHING super huge, I will take credit for it. Well, not because I want any financial gain, but because it is Ady, he is cool with it and he knows me and my madness!

Wednesday - saw me at Westgate having meetings with the management. I am organising an annual event called FAB which stands for fashion and beauty and we needed to iron out little details. It is super exciting working on this event and I cannot wait for July to come around so that it can be here already! I bumped into an international magazine editor (am not allowed to say who) and we chatted. It seems that they may want me to do some work for them (am not allowed to say what). All will be revealed in good time.

Thursday - I was emceeing an event at Nairobi Academy. You see the kids there had come up with an idea to do social work in their extra time. I thought the cause was noble and when they asked me to emcee their fashion show of course I said yes. The event was sponsored by the Deacons group and because I work very closely with them I could not refuse. It was super fun and a nice surprise to see Collo from Kleptomaniax there. He tells me he is going to be a father soon and we chatted about silly things. He made fun of me (as usual) and I made fun of the fact that I think he looks like a very short Usher (not someone who shows you your seat, but the singer).

Friday was April Fools day - it did not help the fact that a huge company called me and wanted Indian faces for a TV Commercial. I went mad calling people and sending texts - everyone thought it was a joke. Well, joke is on you when you see the ad on TV and kick yourself! Next time I am NOT doing business on April Fools. I did not get fooled though but did make a lame attempt at fooling the husband - he didn't fall for it! Shame! Friday also saw me pulling out my corset for Mardi Gras. Mardi Gras was absolute fun. My friends had organised it in order to raise money for their brothers team for Rhino Charge. I had a beautiful mask and was told that the way to collect beads is to flash the person with the most beads. I did not flash no one (but did ask for their numbers and told them I would 'flash' them later - flash is slang for a missed call), but I did end up with plenty of beaded necklaces. The deejay played music that ensured I did not get off the dance floor. It was super fantastic. Btw, after the previous weekends escapade - I promised that I would not drink but when the jello shots were being passed around I had to do as the crowd were doing; when in Rome (when at a Mardi Gras)..
I had some interesting conversations - some included 'how did you have a baby' as a conversation starter. I am sure the dude meant 'how did I manage to fit into my jeans after baby' but if he was seriously asking about 'how I had a baby' then it was not my place to chat to him about the birds and the bees and seriously, he should not have been allowed anywhere near the bar because clearly he was no way near over 18.
There was a point that the shoes came off, but I quickly found them and put them back on. So what if my feet were screaming blue murder! But the rhythm got me (Gloria Estefan is a prophet) and I danced the night away!

On Saturday I hung out with Sachin Tendulkar and MS Dhoni (well, they were on TV and I was watching them) as the Indian cricket team won the world cup. Btw, I don't think you can call it Cricket without pronouncing it properly - this is how you pronounce it CRUH-KEHT and you need a very deep Indian accent while you say it. So I watched Cruhket with Ariyana at home (after my glam mani and pedi) and got dressed for the evening. We went on to watch India win in such an outstanding manner at a dinner party my father in law was throwing in honour of the Indian cricket team. After that we dashed to a friends wedding. Sometimes I wonder how pansie assed individuals who believe so much in their self-importance make up our society - but this is the reason I go out - to observe and giggle in a 'dark corner'. But that is a story for another day. I was thoroughly entertained by a group that go by the name Dhol Ecstacy - I am so using them for my next show! I loved it.
Don't get me wrong, we did have good company and we did the 'hellos and air kisses' to the necessary but we had to dash. In the car again and off to the party that would end the evening.

My gal pal Barbra Minishi knows how to throw a party - it was a Moroccan theme and there was chocolate cake, what more could I ask for? Hawa, the film maker and my good friend was there. I was introduced to her partner (we were being PC - we meant to say her LOVER). I met Emmanuel Jambo who is one of the top photogs in town. Connie - fashion stylist to the stars (I told you, this blog is SOOO about name dropping) tells me she is back from Milan and now here to stay. We arranged a coffee date. I was asked about 'my son' and when I corrected the person she got mighty defensive. I don't mind, you think I had a boy - its cool, it doesn't change the fact that I had a girl! Interesting.
All in all it was a meeting of fab people and Raj and I had to call it a night. It was raining and we were pooped!

We woke up late on Sunday and hung out with our favorite person in the world. Then it was off again - launches, parties, etc. My best bit was meeting a politician and seriously discussing my step into politics. Aha, but that is for another blog and another day!

Basically we made out that life is incredible and it is made up of all sorts and therefore there are never any dull moments. I know I need to make up to my doggies as they are sulking with me this morning. I suppose I will have to pamper and spoil and treat them to a couple of 'pawdicures'.
Another week begins and I am tres excited to see what this one will bring, I am sure it will be super fabulous!!

Ps. Congratulations to my cuz who got engaged over the weekend - I wish her a fab time in planning what I know will be a fab wedding!!

Shoe Blues!!!

It is hard to keep a blog rolling (no pun intended), especially if you feel that you are just using this as an avenue to vent. To be honest, that is what I do. I use this space on the world wide web as my 'therapy'. I release the little niggly thingie majigis that get to me and/or I write stuff about what inspires or amuses me.
I am surprised that you read. Not surprised, more like grateful. I am intrigued that my 'nonsense' actually captures your attention. But you challenge me to come up with creative content week on week. Plus, it gets my otherwise lazy ass to stop shopping online and do other stuff on the net.

This weekend I went out to dinner with some great people. I like good company and good wine. So during dinner of course the blog came up and I was asked about how I come up with content for the blog. To be honest, I don't pre-plan it. I just sit down and write.
So this is how the night went - meet for drinks, have dinner and go for more drinks. I am so not a drinker. I cannot hold my drink and after a glass of wine I get a buzz. Which is why it totally surprised me that I had may be a total of 8 glasses of wine!

Of course I played it cool, not showing my very posh friends that the wine had gotten to me. I tried to keep the conversation 'intelligent' but for some strange reason, I vaguely remember talking about Megamind - the animated movie and how he says the word 'revange' in the movie. I am trying not to replay it in my mind too much - I wonder how loud I was. Anyway, the point is, I thought I was very funny!
My friends, being the cool people they are, never let on that they thought I was making a complete ass out of myself. Raj, who had a drink or two, says I was very well behaved.. until..

I have no idea what happened to me once we ended the evening and I got into the car. I don't remember having a conversation with Raj - but he tells me I made three phone calls. I have always said, never drink and dial. From the minute I sat in the car the night seemed to have ended in my mind. But, I am told, it went on.
I misplaced my very expensive shoes. Don't ask me how. Short of throwing them out of the moving car, I cannot even recall taking them off.

Raj tells me I rushed inside the house and when he got upstairs he saw me chilling in my doggies basket. Oh dear! I did, however, find time (and energy) to take my make up off. Why I was in her basket I have no idea. I then got into bed and started bbming someone. Who? I don't know. What did I say? Your guess is as good as mine! The next morning I was up at 7 and in denial that I had a hangover. 'It never happens with expensive wine' I told myself. Raj and I were supposed to attend a wedding. I rushed over to see my baby who was staying at mums and then came back home, all the time thinking did well and avoided a hangie.
But then at 11am it struck and oh boy did I suffer!!

Raj had to force me out of bed so that I could doll myself up and pretend not to feel ill. It all worked out. Truth is, the older you get, the harder it is for you to get over a hangover, Jay Leno said so on his show. Getting into bed last night was amazing when my head touched my pillow - I was just about to fall off into deep sleep until it dawned on me - MY SHOES!!!!

I know I will find them - I mean seriously, where could the go? But while we are apart, I dedicate this blog to them - oh how I miss you guys..I feel so naked without you - well my feet do. When I said shoe - I didn't mean shoo..come back to me.. :)

Oh, you like my merc? Here are the keys, enjoy...

I watched a film the other day, it had nothing to do with anything, but after the movie I really missed my dad. I don't know what triggered it, but I thought of him with tears in my eyes after a long time.

When I was younger things were very different, the world was not as money minded as it is today. You may have had money, but you would never show it off. Today, it is all about what you have in terms of a car, where you live (do you own or rent), what phone you use, what jewelry you wear, what designer brands you wear and where you holiday. God forbid you don't 'holiday'!! Madonna was some sort of prophet when she sang material world - 20 years too early.
You know, my father was a very wealthy man! Lord help me, the dude was loaded!! When we moved out of our house that we lived in for 28 years - we came across his bank statements from the 70's - the dude had a million dollars in his accounts. A million dollars at that time?  The dude was on point, he was shrewd and he had foresight. I still try and emulate him in any which way I can, but he left HUGE shoes to fill! So what happened? Well, in a nutshell, mum was not business savvy - she trusted people and had such a giving heart - so she gave. She bailed people out of jail and put our house down as security - the money was never paid back, we lost our house. She gave people millions of dollars to start up businesses for their children or themselves and when she went through a hard time those same people turned to her and said 'what money?'

I don't care. Sure, it would be great to be living large on my fathers money (which is what lots of people do) but I always say those millions were not for me. My father worked hard - he took care of his family  and his extended families and you know what, I say hats off to him. He probably did not know he would die so young, he had plans and he did look out for us. Definitely, my brothers and I were trust fund babies, but again - we 'trusted', we were used, misused and spat out! Too bad. If you know me, I do not play victim!

What pisses me off though is the people who stood by our sides when times were awesome. They were in our lives and constantly in our faces, are the same people who walk away when they see us today. My father housed some people, those people did not even make it to come and see my daughter (you know, too much traffic now-a-days!). My father educated some families and well, lets just say that they are kind of busy to remember. I don't mind, you have a short memory - it comes with old agel! But sometimes, some people make you wonder - I remember meeting one of my dads 'very good friends' at Westgate and he stopped me to tell me what a big hearted man dad was. 'You know, he gave me a mercedes...' he rambled on. He gave you a mercedes????? And your brother was the same lawyer who was suing me in court??????? Jeez louise!!! Where the F do people get off?

I just thought I would share. I think it goes a long way to have a big heart. I always go on and on about karma, but it is a fact - you do good and good will come your way - you forget, then you, sadly, will be forgotten. A friend of mine who lives in LA was telling me about leaving a legacy. I believe that is what papa did. He left a legacy that almost 30 years after his demise, he is still remembered.

But if you take advice from blogs, just remember to remember.

News? or 'Olds'?

Here's me enjoying a nice hot morning with Ariyana in the garden and I hear my phone ring. By the time I get to it I have obviously missed the call. I look at the caller ID and see that my gal pal, Easy Fm radio presenter, Angela Angwenyi called me. If there is anything I love it is chatting to Angela. Angela is a great person, she doesn't mince her words, she gets right to the point and she is very well spoken. I have worked with Angela in the past and she is very upfront - if she likes it she tells you, if she doesn't - she does not waste time bitching about it behind your back - she tells you. So I hurriedly called her back thinking that we were going to do some great work together.

Angela being Angela answered the phone and said 'Hi Pinky, it's Angela Angwenyi' and I said 'I know!' - the last time she called, I hadn't saved her number. It didn't offend her that I tried to make up a crappy excuse as to why I didn't have her number on my now old, then new phone.
Anyway, Angela invited me onto her show that she hosts with Edward Kwach every weekday on Easy FM. It is a prime show - the evening show. I have seen loads of advertising for the same on Facebook - great marketing! I couldn't go in on the same day as my brother was due back from South Africa and I had to pick him up, so we agreed that I go in today.

The thing about 21 questions is that they narrow down people who they have researched that their listeners want to know more about. Angela explained that the questions are not your normal questions, they are fun, they are different and they are slightly edgy. Why not? I love silly banter!
This afternoon I checked into the Nation Building and as I opened the studio door, I felt like I had opened the door to the past. I saw people that I have worked with, that I knew from radio days, that I worked for. It was amazing. The thing is, we go a long way back - more than 12 years. Where has time gone?

Anyway, we get into the 21 questions and they shot all sorts of questions at me. From where I do my hair (what happened to topical questions like 'Pinky, what do you think of the situation in Lybia?') to how I got my nickname to if I found breastfeeding erotic! It was silly, it was fun, it was interesting to be interviewed in a unique manner. I got bored with one question! If you listened to the interview you will know which one. I thought radio stations are meant to be current - how does it matter about what was talked about 7 odd years ago.
Ah well..like they said - asking the questions that no one else dare ask!

I must say, it was so good seeing Kwach and Angela and the entire team. And before anyone starts any rumours - nope, I was not there 'searching for a job' and even though I spent time in the office of the head of radio, John Wilkins, it was only because he was the person who trained me to be on radio and it had been ages since I saw him and we were chatting about the good old days! Yes, Kwach held my hand as he escorted me to Johns office and to the elevator but NO, we are not having a thing! And yes, I met Smriti, NTV anchor and my future cousin-in-law and nope the press do not just write about her because she is dating my cousin and yes, I gave Robert the biggest hug ever because I think he is the most fun on TV!

As I type this I can hear how they have cut and edited the promo - media! But you can never take yourself too seriously in this business, you just gotta go with it and enjoy.
Easy FM 21 questions, make sure you listen in!

Sing loud, Sing proud..

I just happen to come accross this today on Facebook. Tomorrow at 1pm we have been asked to unite in the national anthem and sing it wherever we are. Here is what I got from the website http://www.28feb.co.ke/

We are extremely proud to be Kenyan!
We are proud of our beautiful country!
We are proud of our diversity cultures and traditions!
We are proud of our heroes!
We are proud of our high achievers!
We are proud of being hustlers!
We are proud of our hoods!
We are proud of our tribes and twengs!
We are proud of our kanges and our mats!
We are proud of our artists and musicians!
We are proud of our industries and farms!
We are proud of our sports teams!
On the 28th of February 2011 at 1pm, wherever you are, at work, in the supermarket, in traffic, in school, on campus, in hospitals, in churches, in mosques, in temples, in synagogues, on sports pitches, in court, on your farm, at police stations, at armed forces barracks, in matatus, in buses, on the beach, in the game parks, at the airport, in parliament, in State House, in your homes ..
On the 28th of February 2011 at 1pm, we stand
On the 28th of February 2011 at 1pm, we unite
On the 28th of February 2011 at 1pm, we shall speak in one voice.
On the 28th of February 2011 at 1pm, let’s sing our beautiful and powerful National Anthem, all three verses.
On the 28th February 2011 the world will watch as Kenyans stand UNITED;
1pm, 1 nation, 1 people, 1 anthem, united in 1 prayer for 1 Kenya
We are Kenya!

Here is the national anthem in Kiswahili and in English

Ee Mungu nguvu yetu Ilete baraka kwetu Haki iwe ngao na mlinzi Natukae na undugu Amani na uhuru Raha tupate na ustawi. Amkeni ndugu zetu Tufanye sote bidii Nasi tujitoe kwa nguvu Nchi yetu ya Kenya Tunayoipenda Tuwe tayari kuilinda. Natujenge taifa letu Ee, ndio wajibu wetu Kenya istahili heshima Tuungane mikono Pamoja kazini Kila siku tuwe na shukrani.

O God of all creation Bless this our land and nation Justice be our shield and defender May we dwell in unity Peace and liberty Plenty be found within our borders. Let one and all arise With hearts both strong and true Service be our earnest endeavour And our homeland of Kenya Heritage of splendour Firm may we stand to defend. Let all with one accord In common bond united Build this our nation together And the glory of Kenya The fruit of our labour Fill every heart with thanksgiving.

I say sing it! Let's generate some positive energy for our nation..let's unite...

B.I.T.C.H

As you know I am a strong believer in the law of attraction. I know that we attract all experiences, people and circumstances into our lives. Mind you, having said that, I have no idea how to use this 'power' for my benefit as I am constantly asking myself 'WTF did I do to attract THAT into my life?'

Ever since I was younger I had an issue with girls. The women in my life have always let me down. I generalise - sorry! There are a handful of women who I can swear upon, they will always be there for me and they are constant - one of which, of course, is my mama.
Did you ever watch FRIENDS? I am still so hooked on it - I find myself always going back to the boxsets and watching them over because they were fun. Anyway, do remember the episode where Rachel meets Ross' tall paleontologist friend? I forget her name..Ah well, somehow it comes up that the tall chick doesn't like Rachel and Rachel says 'It's OK, girls tend not to like me'? Well, that, my bloggies, is the story of my FRIGGIN life!

I was bullied in school - it was a year before my O levels when the girls in my class turned on me. I have no idea why, but it was horrid. I ended up dropping out of school and sitting my O levels privately just so I did not have to go through the torture of being teased and made fun of. One girl who made fun of me stamped her foot on the ground and shouted 'I am stepping on your fathers soul'. My father died when I was 6. This happened when I was around 13. It was not fun, to say the least. Kids are mean sometimes.

But this teasing and bullying seemed to continue through out my life not in the school yard manner, but in different ways. I wonder if it is because sometimes I let people into my life and trust them 100 per cent and open up to them and perhaps am to naive. One thing I have learnt is that not everyone wants to see your happiness and the more you succeed, the more people enjoy it when there are times you are not succeeding so much. Some people even like to rub it in your face a little.
In my life, the saying 'with friends like these, who needs enemies?' applies. Like I said, not all my friends are nasty cows, but I am learning to differentiate the good ones from the ones who are there only when times are good.

But I am so not going to play victim here. Like I said before, it is all about the law of attraction. I am not writing this so that I can get any sympathy. No way! This is just an avenue for me to ask, and I have to ask it again "WTF did I do to attract THAT into my life?'. Don't get me wrong, it is not always bad - but 20 per cent of the bad stuff is what I need to STOP attracting.

I believe in the law of reflection - if you keep seeing something in those around you, it means that there is something about them in you - especially what it is that bothers you about them. So if you are bugged by people always cribbing about money - there is something in you that cribs about money. I am surrounded (at times) by bitches..this can only mean one thing, I am a bitch.

I know that hurting people hurt people - so if the women in my life enjoy hurting me, it is only because they have issues in their lives. It is not anything I am going to take personally at all! But I have to keep my karmic record pure and positive - that is the only way I will only attract GREAT stuff in my life - including fantastic people. The bitch in me can take a step back, I will only invite her in if she is desperately needed! Being nice does not necessarily mean you are being foolish, does it? But how much of a nice guy does one have to be? I remember being nice only got me bullied and teased. I have to protect myself to some extent and if this calls for being a bit of a bitch from time to time to ward off the bad, then so be it! It is all about balance.

PS Have a Happy Valentines Day!

I put the FUN in Dysfunctional

I was chatting to an elderly lady last week. She is a lady who is well travelled, well spoken, well put together and spiritual. I like to have conversations whereby I learn something and when I come away from it I don't feel like I wasted thirty minutes of my life. So putting my time to good use, this lady and I started to talk about families and how almost all families may feel like they are totally normal, but instead each and everyone of us has some sort of dysfunction (word?) with thanks to our family.

My grandmother passed away two weeks ago. She was not well. She had been suffering for a while, but as my cousin - who was closer to her than I was, told me - they all knew this was her last leg. My gran was a radio presenter on VOK back in them days. When I got into radio it wasn't because she inspired me to, I did it without knowing she had been on radio, I found out much later in my life, but I suppose media runs in the blood.
Anyway, she was never close to my mum - mum doesn't hide that from anyone. Mum was brought up by her aunt after she walked away from her mum at age 11. When we learnt that granny was unwell, my brother and I told her to visit, but mum being mum said she didn't want to be a hypocrite. They hadn't spoken for 50 odd years, why now?

As you know, I lost dad when I was young. He has a huge family. Here's the deal - dad was married twice. His first wife had three kids and then he met mum, fell in love, married her (that is a story for another blog) and had three more kids. Initially all was hunky dory, but people went their own ways and the inevitable happened - we grew up. When I look at my brother or my husband and see their respective families and wonder how I would treat them should either of them (God forbid) suddenly pass. I would continue to treat them as family, why should things change just because someone is no more?
We may have been very young when dad died, but it didn't make us blind nor did it make us oblivious to the fact that our mother was alone and made to feel that way by a lot of people.

It is very important to treat kids with so much love and respect. I look at Ariyana today and want to do the best I can for her as a parent. Even if it means putting my ego aside and allow her to know her family - she has a HUGE one! The thing is children are not stupid. What we do as adults, what we say, how we behave - all of these things have an impact on a child's life. You may be an aunt, a distant cousin, a father - how you treat the children around you is key to moulding them.
People may think that it is upbringing, that it is solely on the parents to give the child a rounded and healthy childhood. Agreed, it is for the most part. But I can tell you of experiences and memories where someone said something to me and there and then, in those ten seconds thanks to someone else's issues I became slightly dysfunctional.

I would have loved to have grown up with all my cousins and older relatives, grandmothers and grandfathers, alas this was not meant to be. I was chosen to walk down a different path. So what if I am slightly dysfunctional - at least I admit it, I am not in denial! I have to say - the love I received from my mother and my brothers and the few years my father was with me compensated for all the S*** we had to put up with! Dysfunctional? Whatever! I am all for not playing victim - take a situation and turn it around..forget dysfunctional, how about Ms.FUN Galore.

Life's a beach

I love the ocean. There is something very calming about being seaside.
Every year in January my husband and I celebrate our wedding anniversary. We made a pact that we would avoid the December holiday madness and stay in Nairobi during that time and instead travel during our anniversary. Poor guy, hubby darling, in December he has to bear with my shopping sprees and my need to entertain. In January he has to take me on 'our honeymoon' as I still refer to it, to the coast - because it is a nice time to be there and I love being by the beach (did I already mention that?). In February he has to deal with Valentine's Day (oh yes, I celebrate it!) and then three days after that my birthday!

Yes, I would like to be one of those girls who settle for a rose or an I love you as a gift, but if you know me, then you know that I am high maintenance when it comes to celebrations. Buy me gifts, spoil and pamper me, go crazy and surprise me, feel free and go all out and spend every last penny, I love the WOW factor! Don't get me wrong, I am not a person who is all take take take, I give as well. Ask him; I buy him something for Xmas, and then our anniversary, I spoil him on the day of love and make sure his birthday is memorable gift wise. I am all about quality and quantity. I take time planning, shopping and wrapping. The thing about Raj, he is simple. He would love a rose or an I love you just fine. He is adorable because whatever I do for him (even if it is S***) he smiles, thanks me from the bottom of his heart and pretends to love it.
More often than not, I get it right!

Raj and I have not had a beach holiday for about two years now. Reason; we moved out two years ago and suddenly we realised we had bills to pay! Forget about pay cheque, how about reality check!! Then I got pregnant and the doctor advised that I not travel during the pregnancy given my history. So Raj said to me that he would take us (his baby and I) on a nice long holiday to enjoy the sun and the sea when baby was old enough. What a coincidence she was old enough to travel during our anniversary.

As much as it all fell into place, Raj, my lovely loverson, went to play hockey, as he does every Friday evening and on that fateful evening, he split his thumb, got 4 stitches and fractured his thumb. Ouchie! I felt bad for him (although am sure he did it on purpose!). He is in pain and was told it would take at least  6 weeks to heal. So our holiday plans went to pot. Not because he said so, oh no! Au contraire, Raj is such a super guy, he insisted he take me on holiday - he said he would chill by the pool with baby, he didn't have to swim!
Raj hurt his right hand, he can barely carry his baby at the moment, let alone my bags full of my bikinis and now a pushchair and a diaper bag. I could not possibly ask that of him..or could I?

I may be selfish to some extent, but I just thought that it would totally be unfair. Also, I didn't see it being much of a holiday for me considering I would be doing all the lugging and carrying to and fro (selfish, me? never!!!). So we called it off for a later date - he owes me BIG time - I hear Jamaica is beautiful in June. Truth of the matter is, I am in my ideal place for this time, Nairobi weather is enjoyable and I have a pool right outside my home, my baby is who I spend my days with, my two dogs give me so much joy and I don't really have to be anywhere at any particular time. This is my ideal holiday, what more could I ask for? Ah yes the beach, for that I have my imagination. Shhh...Just don't tell Raj.